Jensen Huang Couldn’t Keep His Chip in His Pants. We’ll All Suffer the Consequences

Résumé détaillé

Jensen Huang gives a keynote address at a technology conference on October 21, 2026 in Berlin, Germany. Every once in a while, however, the consequences are hugely…

You would think after a couple million years of evolution, human males would have developed to the point that their brains would drive their behavior more than the dangly thing between their legs.

Every day we see countless examples of lives ruined, stupidity unbound, conflict triggered, and general mayhem unleashed because men give their penises reign over every aspect of their lives. It’s likely that in your own life you see examples of this sad reality…or are an example of this sad reality.

Every once in a while, however, the consequences are hugely disproportionate to the size of the organs involved. (Come to think of it, aren’t they always?) The entire sad and repugnant life of Donald Trump is one such example. He may think he’s a king. But he’s ruled by what Stormy Daniels described as his little toadstool and so, sadly, at least until recently, were we.

And now comes one of the most costly out-of-control schlongs of our time, the one belonging to Jensen Huang…one that has sent shock waves throughout the world, admittedly with the help of and magnified by the aforementioned Trump schween and the incredibly tiny little guys of many of those in Trump’s orbit.

As a consequence of this combination, Huang has achieved the impossible: Although he slept with only three women (that we know of) outside of his marriage, he has managed to f–k millions.

First, of course, is the damage he has done to his family. Then, we have the damage he has done to Nvidia’s shareholders, who have endured seeing literally hundreds of billions of dollars of the company’s market cap wiped away because of the scandal. By extension, we have the damage done to Nvidia’s employees. Their company has been thrown into chaos. This is due in part to the failure of Huang and the company’s board to have a reasonable succession plan in place (or to deal with this issue when it first began to emerge, which may be as long as a year ago).

There are industry-wide ramifications too.

Valuations in the AI sector…

In…

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